Pertaining to the Craft Tarot Death Contact Home

Waiting for the Goddess


I am walking on soft, warm sand.   I can't see the ground beneath my feet because it's covered with a heavy, swirling mist.   I can't see the path, and I can't even see my own feet.

I arrive at the edge of the mist, and I see:   A quiet bubbling spring that is surrounded by a ring of stones.   I have never been here before, but I know that this is the place of the Goddess.   She summoned me here in a voice that spoke directly into my heart, a voice that spoke without words.

I must wait for the Lady Who Has 10,000 Names.   I am Here.   I sit down on the sand.

For a long time, she does not appear.   In this place, time has little meaning.   It could have been minutes, or it could have been days.   I create a quietness within myself.   I close my eyes, and wait.   I will know when she arrives.

And then I know it is time to open my eyes.   She is standing there, just over on the other side of the gurgling spring.   I would know her even without her solar disc, her beautiful outstretched wings, her diaphanous white gown.

She speaks.   "You have come without a question to ask me.   You have come without a request."

"I came because you asked me to come."

"And have you been waiting long?"

"Yes."

"Why do you think I summoned you, my child?"

"I don't know."

"Think.   You know."

I closed my eyes for a few seconds.   When the answer came to me, it was a surprise.   "You summoned me because ... you wanted me to wait."

"Yes.   What else?"

"Because ... I needed to wait.   I needed to stop."

"And while you were waiting, my child ... what were you waiting for?"

"I was waiting for what I'm always waiting for ... the next thing."

She smiled, and leaned forward slightly.   "You have learned something.   Tell me what you have learned."

I thought for a minute.   "I'm always trying to look ahead, looking for The Next Thing, and it robs me of the pleasure I can have in the Now.   You wanted me to learn that Waiting is Being, and that Being should be experienced in the Now, not in the anticipation of The Next Thing."

"Yes.   Go on."

"The Next Thing doesn't exist.   It isn't real ... yet.   And the moments that are right here with me are slipping away, unused, unappreciated.   There is no past; it's gone for good.   The future doesn't exist yet.   There is only NOW.   That's what I've been doing wrong ... I was focusing on ... the Next Thing."

"Tell me what The Next Thing is for you."

"Oh, there's more than one.   Soon I'll finish college.   Sandy and I are going to get married in a couple of months.   And then I'll get my first real job.   Then I'll want to buy a house, and Sandy wants children ..."

"And none of those things exists now?"

"No."

"And the expectation of these future things ... does it keep you from seeing the beauty that exists right now?"

"Yes."

"Your Today should be much more than a mere hope of what may happen tomorrow."

And then she was gone.


Pertaining to the Craft Tarot Death Contact Home